They say it’s different between men and women. Personally, I store my fat here:
When I was a kid, my mother used to have this thing, this metal, adjustable, spring-loaded contraption that clipped onto the top of any frying pan, like a lid, but with holes and you just tilted your pan and poured the grease right out. Into the sink. While cold water ran down the drain.
Now, however, due to the freaking out and chastising of my husband, I must pour fat from ground beef or whatever into a spaghetti sauce jar. But I have to use the frying pan lid, carefully placing the lid on top but leaving a little opening on one side as I torque my body and strain my wrists waiting for the last few drops of fat to fall into the jar. It’s quite precarious, and one of these days a disaster will occur.
My kingdom for a proper meat strainer/drainer/thingy! I can’t find such a beast anywhere! What do YOU people use to drain your meat (so to speak)?
I swear if it doesn’t exist, this would be the perfect thing for me to invent and become rich off of with one of those Guthy-Renker/Ronco-type infomercials:
“…just snap it on, then secure it using our patented Nanny Goats In Panties ‘Pan Strapper’. Look at how easy this fat pours into your spaghetti sauce jar. Are ya keepin’ up with me camera guy? It’s so easy a goat can use it! And if you act before midnight tonight, we’ll throw in three empty spaghetti sauce jars free!”
Yeah, man. I just need me a goat costume and an extra large pair of pink ruffled panties, like Braja made me the other day when she honored me as Talk Show Host #3 in her sidebar…
I’m gonna be rich! Rich, I tell ya! Just look for me in your Preview Guide under “Paid Programming”.
* * *
Thank you to Words of Wisdom From a Smart Mouth Broad for awarding me with the manly Measures Up award. Because that’s the kind of guy I am. Thankful, that is.
A big bark of thanks to Dennis The Vizsla Dog for awarding me with the Kreativ Award.
Thanks to Fergie Sims for awarding me this pretty Butterfly.The Bookworm award from The Twisted Path.
Nooter the Dog tagged me with the 7 Random Things thing.
Omah’s Helping Hands tagged the Bajeezus out of me, first with a tag, and then with a beautiful sentiment. Just overflowing with the link love, that woman.
Jane from ByJane tagged me with the 7 Random Things thingy.
I can’t perpetuate them all, but I want to acknowledge you, return the link love, and let you know how much I appreciate it – THANK YOU!!!
I drain meat fat into a collander that is precariously perched on a bowl in the kitchen sink. Later, when the fat’s congealed. I scrape the bowl and throw the fat into the garbage. Yes, I change garbage bags with great frequency. Yes, there’s probably a much “greener” method. No, I’m not going to read the 69 comments above to search for it.
I bought an actual vintage grease jar on ebay. It’s what I’ll keep my fat in from now on!
Not only do I have an almost identical jar o’lard on my counter…. cripes… I’ve got the same tile… Cue Twilight Zone TV theme….
fat? we only eat hotdogs around here…hotdogs and chicken nuggets and bologna sandwhichs. no need for flushing fat down the drain. now we have all sorts of things that we put in the toilet, or rather my daughter puts in the toilet–my little ponies, blocks, trimmers, scissors,ect..
you know, the usual.
Please tell me all that fat isnt from one meal…
I hide my fat in my big ‘ol granny panties.
I didn’t have time to read through everyone’s comments.
I just pour it directly into the trash! Usually the trash if full so it isn’t running straight to the bottom. If I need to then I’ll put paper towels in the trash to soak it up. I refuse to save fat! Blech!
I do own a little metal container that says ‘grease’ on the outside. I believe it has bacon fat from 1993 in it! LOL!!
OMG.
We used to store out fat in a metal can too.
Now I seem to be storing my fat in my triple chin!
All I can think of is that Friends episode where for Rachel to forgive Ross she is going to make him drink the fat.
I’m a vegetarian, so its less about draining the meat and more about not buying it.
Thanks for visiting my blog. Now I have to follow you. Why do we go though this fat storing process? I mean how much fat do you have to use to clog a drain? I don’t think anyone cooks like that anymore, do they?
You gift is posted on my site. I hope you’ll stop by and see what I got you.
And as soon as you have patented your grease drizzle thingy you can sell it…and then there will be a whole bunch of Pinoy/Pinay blogs touting the wonder of the Frilly Pants Grease Drizzle Thingy that no one can live without. You rock!
Spaghetti jar just like you.
Girl you make me laugh!!
I think it’s mostly in my thighs, but some ends up in my cheeks (both kinds).
Hey…I’d buy your gadget…oh wait…I don’t cook…so I don’t have to drain anything! See those little microwave dishes come already prepared…and I don’t have to give a ratsazz what they do with their fat drainage. woo hoo! it pays to be lazy!
I used to remove the meat and then let the fat harden so I could scrape it out into the garbage, but, like you, my husband’s sanity just couldn’t take it and so I now do it “his way” because it’s easier than an argument over something so silly. His way is th esame as your husband’s… all jars get saved at our house (a waste of perfectly recyclable glass, if you ask me – sheesh) to put fat into.
I store my fat in my enormous billowing belly.
Someday a man is going to think it’s…pretty.
tis the season for hilarity i guess… made me laugh out loud!
okay… seriously though… I keep a large empty coffee can under the sink, which just happens to fit my medium metal colander’s bottom. Colander on top of coffee can… put the meat into the colander and drain away… When I empty a new coffee can, I though the old one away and start over. I also use the can for any scraps that I’m not going to compost.
was this a serious question???
LOL! Perhaps you could store your fat in those pink knickers?
Those ruffly pink panties are fantastic! I can’t imagine trying to stuff them into my jeans, though! ;O)
I am stopping here from SITS. I am still working on my SITSmas list. That post was great. I love your poem.
I also like your infommercial. My husband for a while was collecting grease. I told him I would never use it. Too Gross!!
I store my fat just where I don’t want it…all over.
Personally I store my fat on my Muffin Top.
But really I use a Turkey Baster to suck the fat out of my food.
You’re a genius! A soon to be rich genius! I’ll buy your fat trapper thingy!
I store it in the backsides of every plaintiff who sues my clients, it seems. Then they blame their pre-existing health issues on us.
LOVE the fluffy pink nanny granny knockers.
I store my fat in my thighs and yogurt containers. I put one outside tonight so the birds will eat it. It’s like a science experiment and I’ll keep you posted. I know they’ll eat suet, but we don’t really cook a lot of meat so this is chicken fat. Wait! Would that turn the bird into cannibals if I tricked them into eating chicken fat?
Weeks from now I’ll see two horror stricken cardinals tweeting “Tweet, soylent green, tweet!”
Dude, I’m wearing a Pan Strapper right now and, let me tell you, it was SO worth the $19.95.
Yesss.
If you’re going to invent that pan strapper thingy, you need to have an infomercial where someone is trying to drain fat out of a hot pan without your device, and because she doesn’t have your ingenious tool, she receives third degree burns and then looks at the camera with that overly-exasperated look of frustration before calling 911.
Wow. That was a long sentence.
I put mine in decorative jars and give it to the neighbors for Christmas every year. I think they store it in their wine cellars.
Recently I saw on an episode of Trailer Park Boys (not that I watch that show! Or received it 8 days in a row off of my Netflix queue.) a delicacy called bread heels and grease. It was appealing and appalling, all at the same time.
Otherwise, I store mine right around my middle, where it’s guaranteed to do the mos damage, apparently.
I’ve just got the post-itus itch today. Must be because I’m such an expert on fat AND cooking. Both of the products shown here are pot strainers for straining water soluble liquids like the water in a stock pot.
To separate out fat, you need an actual fat strainer. There are several out there, I use one by OXO that you can get at Target or Cooking.com:
Click for Pic, opens in new window
You pour off the pan fat into the strainer and let it sit. The fat will separate out with the solids on the bottom in a few minutes. Pour the solids out the spot in the bottom and what is left is fat ready for storage.
Or, as I like to call it, Heart attack in a spaghetti sauce jar.
As for storage, I store my fat in the city sewer system. I have lost 60# since last April (I started on April Fools Day just because I’m twisted). Metabolized fat leaves the body in your urine, which is why all the weight loss diets want you to drink a bazillion glasses of water a day.
So, basically, every time I pee-pee I wave bye-bye to my ass as it flushes out to sea.
To those who flush the fat down the sink while running hot water. What happens is that when the fat hits your cold sewer pipes it condenses and forms a rind on your pipe. Over time it will build up and start catching food particles from your garbage disposal. Before you know it, you have a nasty plug in your pipe.
If you want to make sure your Roto-Rooter man can send all his kids to college, keep flushing melted fat down your pipes.
Either throw the stuff out in a tin can or let the stuff harden and flush with COLD water.
I will admit to storing no fat thank you… I am trying to be lean and mean for the holidays. I’ve decided to pay it forward in the fat department with extra hikes for the next few weeks.
Now the fat straining contraption you are referring sounds like it deserves a 1/3 page in the WHAT IS IT? category from Cook’s Illustrated. I am sure if I saw one I would have no idea what the heck it was and would require professional direction as to it’s use.
What’s “fat”?
so true, though, I was of the fling it down the drain, but my husband taught me proper fat disposal procedures.
You’ve propbably seen this by now but her ya go.
http://www.cooking.com/products/shprodde.asp?SKU=125558
http://www.amazon.com/RSVP-Endurance%C2%AE-Crescent-Pot-Strainer/dp/B000PSUUDY/ref=pd_bxgy_k_img_b
Well, if you invent it, I’ll be it. For now, I’m with Vodkamom also. Seems to be the main fat storage place around here.
Ohilda
Haha… now if you could make a contraption that would let me strain the fat from my thighs into a jar, I’d pay dearly for that!
BTW, I tagged you for the 6 random things meme; seeing as you’re super busy you might not get to it… but I thought of you!
I store my fat on the couch deeply embedded in a cushion holding a remote on Sundays watching football.
….thank god Hubby doesn’t read the comments I leave for other people
Mine goes into a plastic container with a lid and gets dumped in the trash.
Except Bacon Grease. I save that and let it sit in my fridge for a few years, then remember it’s there and throw it out.
I have been pouring my cooking fat off into the sink for YEARS while running hot water. However, after a recent plumbing debacle, our plumber told me not to do that. So now I guess I’ll be using the funky jar of fat like you. Maybe I can knit a cozy for it?
I don’t “store” my fat in my ass, hips and thighs….I “save” it there in case I need it later, for emergencies!
World famine? I’m safe!
Those skinny b***ches won’t last. No offense to the skinny b***ches.
Uhm, I buy ground sirloin… yeah, so we don’t have that excess fat in a jar problem… although I doubt that would be a problem to a goat… must make for a lovely cocktail, glass jar and all.
Don’t have any problem now I don’t eat meat.
Love the big knickers!
My mom had a thingee like that too..and she had a pottery thingee that said “grease” on the side. I think dad used it on his hair as well.
I don’t want to talk about fat.
That is a very much needed item! I usually scoop the meat into another container then drain the fat into the jar like you do.
i try to cook w/out fat… but when it’s there.. it goes in a can/jar and then gets disposed of… but look at you fancypants!
🙂
i ♥ me some pink rufflebottom panties! (just got some myself!) ha!