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childhood

Primitive Patriotism And Other Speculative Drama

I’m so old now that I get to kick sentences off with such phrases as, “Well, in MY day…” while holding my aching back, aimlessly waving a crooked index finger and calling people “whippersnappers”. So while you’re here, noshing on my snacks and drinking my beer, you will indulge me as I take you back […]

Of Grandmas and Chocolate

I was born with a plastic spoon in my mouth. So my palate wasn’t exactly…evolved. When I was a kid I hated German chocolate cake. Actually, I didn’t like chocolate at all, but add that funky coconut or whatever it was that made a cake German chocolate and…..BLEH! My favorite cake was yellow cake with […]

Putting the "Boom" Back Into Baby Boomers: El Camino’s 50-Year High School Reunion.

I went to a 50-Year High School reunion over the weekend. Right now, you are probably thinking, “What??? Man, you are one old goat. What does that make you…67…68 years old?” ACK! The heck you say! No, I took my Dad to his high school reunion. How dare you! My father can’t drive and can’t […]

We Have No Waiting (Or a Sense of Humor) at Checkstand #1

So I’m at the 15 Items or Less line in the grocery store. Safeway to be exact. Checkstand #2 to be even more exact. I realize I’m standing behind my neighbor. He’s an old guy who I’ve seen several times around the neighborhood who always seems a little out of it and every time we […]

Crime and Punishment: The Middle School Years

If my mother’s ashes weren’t scattered out to sea somewhere, I could ask her a few things I’ve been wanting to know. Like, who did she vote for? Did she believe in God? Why the hell did she marry that lying-ass idiot fourteen years her junior after she divorced my father? And most importantly, what […]

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