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Crawling Through Downtown Napa

You know that high-piercing banshee scream that happens whenever it starts to rain? You know, when it’s a quiet still night and you’re lying in your own vomit on the kitchen floor at 3am on a Wednesday morning and the dog is staring at you through the sliding glass door wanting to come in already […]

Another Ed Sullivan Theater Break-In

Look, I don’t know what it is about my presence at TV stations and seemingly coincidental alien abductions of the entire crew, but there I was, yakking it up with David Letterman in the green room of the Ed Sullivan Theater and all of a sudden, he and everyone else just… disappeared. The missing Paul […]

Can You Find the Bloggers in these Pictures?

In case you missed the national news last week, I was in New York City and I had the dubious honor of hob-nobbing with several bloggers. Primarily because I hunted them down like the stalker that I am and browbeat them all until they submitted to seeing me. So tell me how many of these […]

9/11 Memorial in NYC: A Mini-Tour and How-To Guide

I guess I was two or three days late being all significant and stuff, visiting the 9/11 Memorial on its 10th anniversary because I didn’t go until Sept 14. Not that I was allowed in on Sept 11 anyway. The way I heard it, pretty much nobody was. But if you want a sneak peek […]

How to Feel Fat, Old, and Frumpy

The good thing about having lost weight as I’ve gotten older, is that I’ve lost weight. The bad thing is that I’ve gotten older. What’s that saying? Every time one door opens some troll pokes you in the eye with a sharp stick. Or something like that. This week I’m in New York reporting to […]

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