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The Continuing Saga of ‘As The World Ends’

Oct 20th, 2011
by Margaret.

Episode 248: Dancing with Hamsters

Good evening. And welcome to yet another installment of As The World Ends, a multi-part series spanning the eons where we follow the adventures of various protagonists in their preparation for the End of Days.

We last left our heroine, Garibaldina, on May 21, 2011 grappling with the notion of spending her entire fortune on chocolate Hershey’s kisses and her attempt at devouring them all because, well, the world was about to end, so what the hell.

judgment day, judgement day, may 21 2011, end of the world

But the world did not end, so her digestive system had plenty of time to revolt on her and cause her great pain.

For weeks.

Also, she had no money left. Because the world did not end. She found herself poor and after all the chocolate was gone, starving.

Luckily, we live in an age where re-inventing yourself is de rigueur, so since she had told her last boss to cram something oblong into a place that would have felt inordinately uncomfortable, and then, oh yeah, the world did not end, she did not try to return, but rather, came up with a new career of her own. A start-up, if you will.

Yes, Garibaldina, decided to make a lot of money as a blogger. She filmed her hamster, Groovy Baby, doing cute and silly things, posted them on her blog each day, monetized it and began raking in the dough. She spoke at blog conferences as a niche hamster blog expert, self-published a book, “How To Blog about Your Hamster, Groovy Baby, and Rake in the Dough” and despite its lack of editing, sold millions of copies.

Garibaldina invented her own version of the Groovy Baby Hamster dance which went viral and is taking over wedding receptions all over the world. Bollywood directors are knocking down her door now for the rights to develop a musical based on Groovy Baby.

But once again, here she is at a cross roads. The world is about to end on October 21, 2011 and Garibaldina must make the decision whether to chuck it all in some hedonistic live-for-the-moment have-sex-with-everyone-in-your-vicinity spree again, or save her hardly hard-earned money and wait it out.

And even though her hero, the self-proclaimed End of Days prophet Harold Camping, was wrong all those other times about the end of the world, what if, WHAT IF, he’s right this one time? After all, he says that this date is “probably” the one. That sounds more realistic, right?

OMG - What should Garibaldina do?

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  • http://www.janssushibar.com Jan’s Sushi Bar

    OMG – What should Garibaldina do?

    Hunt down Richard Gere and tell him to bend over?

    Oh, wait - that was gerbils. Never mind.

    • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

      hee heeee! You’re crazy!

  • http://wmljshewbridge.blogspot.com/ Lorie Shewbridge

    I think she should hold on to the hamsters… JUST in case!

    • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

      Those hamsters were indeed good for her, so I agree.

  • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

    Hee heeee! You’re crazy!

  • http://pricillaspeaks.blogspot.com Pricilla

    I personally am going to eat all the apples the publicist will feed me and then on the 22nd……..

    I am going to eat all the apples the publicist will feed me.

    • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

      Pricilla? I like your attitude.

  • Debby

    Get another hampster?

    • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

      Yes!

  • http://beetle-blog.com/ babs (beetle)

    But it’s already October 21st in Australia, and it’s only 1 hour 40 minutes away for us, so does the world end one country at a time?

    • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

      Oh dear, that’s a good point. You mean like one big tidal wave?

      • http://beetle-blog.com/ babs (beetle)

        I guess, as we haven’t heard on the news that Australia has vanished, we can assume it’s wrong again ;)

        • Debby

          But have we heard that it HASN’T? *bites finger nail nervously*

          • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

            GASP! *bites Debby’s other fingernails nervously*

          • Debby

            EXCUSE ME, MARGARET!!!! I was saving those for the next big crisis.

          • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

            oops! *sheepishly spits out Debby’s other fingernails*

          • Debby

            Nannygoats can be sheepish? Who knew?

  • FreaKeroppi

    Did I already tell you about what I did on May 21st this year? If not, remind me to do so. :)

    • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

      OK, remind me to remind you. I’m older than you and am prone to senility.

  • Sieg Heil

    Perhaps you meant to say “spanning” the eons?

    • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

      Well crap. That sounds way better, doesn’t it. Perhaps I’ll just sneak up there and change it.

  • http://injaynesworld.blogspot.com/ Jayne

    The world was supposed to end yesterday? Crap. Once again, I did not get that memo.

    That Garibaldina sounds like a resourceful kind of gal. I’m bettin’ she saved her bucks this time.

    • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/ Margaret (nannygoats)

      I think if you don’t get the memo, then for you, the world does not end. Except for those of us who DO get the memo, the world does not end for us either.

      I think I’m going to cancel my subscription to these memos because I just keep getting disappointed each time. When will I ever learn?

      • http://injaynesworld.blogspot.com/ Jayne

        I guess if we live every day as if it was our last, it really won’t matter, will it?

        Wait. That might mean a lot of jail time. I’d better rethink that.

    • http://mommamiameaculpa.com meleahrebeccah

      I missed the memo too, Jayne!