Toil and Trouble in Paradise

You know how when you're really in the mood for a good hot pot of witch's brew? I mean, totally emotionally invested in it, that nothing can stop you? And now your family's happiness is riding on it because you promised them you'd make the best pot of disected animal pieces they've ever had? I mean, just the thought of Dragon's blood and Toe of Frog makes your mouth water, doesn't it?

So last night, I was adding the finishing touches to my brew when I reached into the pantry for the Eye of Newt, and wouldn't you know it, the jar was empty. So I hopped on my broom, leaving the cauldron to simmer on the stove, and swept over to the local pagan grocer's only to find the following sign taped on their front door (you can click on the pic to enlarge it if necessary):



Normally, I always always ALWAYS have a potion or two on me, but I was in the middle of a quick run-to-the-store-for-this-one-thing-I'll-only-be-a-minute shopping trip. I stood at the door, at a loss for what to do. If I returned without the Eye of Newt, my warlock of a husband would no doubt volunteer my ass as a soon-to-be-burning defendant at the next round of witch trials in Salem.

I flew around town, and while other stores carried Eye of Newt, it wasn't organic. Meanwhile, I was running out of time, and I couldn't just leave the cauldron unattended for so long.

It suddenly occurred to me that Poynsetta, my neighbor, might very well have some. Turns out, she had barrels of it, but again, not organic. "Don't worry," she said, handing me her copy of Spell Casting For Dummies. "Just use this. It works wonders."

Well, let me tell you, casting spells was never so easy. I even got a little crazy with some extra ingredients. Chapter 6 on "Putting the Organ Back in Organic" was a Godsend. And the warlock will never be the wiser.