The Best Little Cathouse? Why, Heck Yes.

After a visit to the Circus of Misfit Animals that is my father's house, I have decided to open a shelter for off-kilter four-legged friends. I will call it The Nanny Goats in Panties Institute for Retarded Pets and Waffle House (because in this economy, you gotta have a backup plan).

Why am I using the word "retarded?" Because calling them morons or idiots is just plain mean. I don't mean "retarded" in the derogatory sense; I mean it in the literal sense, so look that up in your Funk & Wagnalls.

And I'm not talking about physically disabled kitties like Ringo, the one-eyed feline, who has no trouble swinging it with the ladies. No, I'm talking about a cat named Fred who is currently squatting at my Dad's house.

Ladies...?  Meet Fred:

This poor homeless cat who has already sent two of the other residents to the vet, is currently locked up in my father's bedroom, with occasional daily privileges to the rest of the house when the other wounded-but-recovering residents are outside. I forget his story about why he is there or, I don't care or, whatever. And I don't know if he is actually retarded, but he's cross-eyed and that can't be winning him any prom dates now, can it. If you were a cat, would you date this guy? No, of course you wouldn't because you're a vain fur ball and looks matter! And if you look retarded, you are not getting any.

On the other hand, Ringo whom some of you met and fawned over last Fall, is like Sylvester Stallone after a boxing match.

He wears his missing eye like a war-torn battle hero. Whereas Fred:

Fred looks like the guy in Accounting who lost his job long ago but still shows up anyway so they transfer him down to the basement and he wants to know whatever happened to his stapler.

Yeah, THAT guy.

Thank You Letter(s)

First of all, I would like to thank Google who has decided that Nanny Goats in Panties should be the #1 (NUMBER ONE!!!) search result for "Sacramento Humor Blog". Woo Hoo! I should also note that it is the #1 result when you enter Nanny Goats in Panties, or does that go without saying? I always forget whether or not I should point out the obvious.


And I really appreciate Heather of Nobody But Yourself totally adoring me and stalking me in her post, Things Which Are Thingish.

A big THANK YOU to one of my longtime bloggy friends, Jan of Jan's Sushi Bar for bestowing this pretty thing on me.

I would like to thank Gladys over at Gladys Tells All for the Lemonade Award. Thanks, Gladys!!!

And thank you to Jan at Jan's Place for the Lovely Blog Award. Which is....lovely!